Whooooaaaaaaaaaahhhh..

First 9am to 5pm day in a long time. I am often up and about by 8am but it’s somehow worse when you have to actually go to work. If you had asked me 5 years ago if I would ever manage to work 2pm - 10pm, I would have laughed at such a prospect - after all, how the hell could I do that and still watch Buffy on a Thursday? Still, 5 years later and here I am. A complete late-shift convert. I find it almost unbearable to lose my 6 hours of free time in the morning. It just doesn’t seem the same having it in the evening (like now). I know this pathetic whingeing will fall on the deaf ears of those of you blessed with a more flexible and varied shift pattern, but what are you gonna do? Get your own blog.

So there I was at 8am. Showered, shaved, firm windsor knot in the tie and heading for my car-sharing friend’s house. Great chum though she may be, quick to get ready she is not. At 1pm this is not a problem. At 8am with only an hour to get to a place the other side of the city it may be.  Luckily she was on fine form and we made it onto the busy thoroughfares of Plymouth only to be greeted with something I hadn’t seen in a long time. Morning rush hour traffic. 25 minutes later and we had only gone about half of the first of the many miles. Gulp.

Not to worry though. We were more or less on time at the huge building - last visited by my good self many years ago during my “induction” course. Unfortunately, like a drunken mouse in a maze I was completely flummoxed by a combination of automatic, manual and push-button doors. I go to work 6 hours early and all of a sudden I have turned into a OAP who’s not sure when to step on the escalator. After convincing the receptionist that the face in front of her was in fact a slimmer version of the fat bloke on my photo ID, she let us in and told us to wait in the canteen. One very strong coffee later (big mistake) and our trainer for the day took us to a room with the words “Learning Suite” etched on the door.

Now, since my days as an in-house trainer, I have huge respect for others who do the same. In the last few years, I have been on a course or three and they have all left me with a desire to go back and do it all again. This time though I would steal all the best techniques and ideas.

All good courses these days start with Introductions, Fire Safety Instructions and an Agenda. I always managed at least one of these (I shall leave you to guess which one) but never all. To be honest, two of them never occurred to me.

Then comes the Icebreaker. Again, something I never did, mainly because I always knew all of my attendees quite well. Icebreakers are a good idea but always fill me with dread.

I remember fondly a visit to a company in Ireland a few years ago to train some colleagues in Microsoft Office Software. It was great fun but it was the first time I had trained people I didn’t know at all. Perhaps on reflection it was not the best of ideas to suggest an ice-breaking session where they either had to do a magic trick, sing a song or show their bottom. I was joking of course, but I am fairly sure that all three are still basically regarded as a sin in southern Ireland to this day and I was met with a set of stony expressions that would have done Mount Rushmore proud.

Anyway, back to Plymouth 2007.

On the course with me were 3 people from my shift who I all knew quite well, 2 from the early shift and 2 from nights. I vaguely knew most of them.

For our Icebreaker we were all given a blank sheet of A2 Flip Chart paper and told to draw our life story. This we would then present to the assembled group. 8 foreheads hit the desk. Well 7 actually. I was already drawing and wondering quietly if I would have (a) time and (b) room.  I actually did quite well even though I missed out loads. There is a photo of part of the sheet on my One-Picture-A-Day Set on Flickr (Click Here to see it). I started top-left with a terrible picture of The Blackpool Tower, the only landmark I could think of near Lytham St Annes (where I was born). Even the golfer nearby didn’t give any clue. Following that, a tank indicated my dad’s career and a plane flying round a globe, our travels around the world. A fine rendition of the DYRMS Clocktower was wasted on the assembled throng, perched high as it was on some splendid white cliffs above a stormy sea. Next a mysterious rendition of Plymouth Hoe mystified a room full of people who see the real thing every day of their lives. A stunningly realised and perspectively accurate drawing of my workplace next to a play-school like sketch (I was running out of time) of Badgers Wood complete with mother and cats finished it off.

If that sounds amazing, please remember that I only had 3 very large felt tips - red, green and blue.

It was an amazing experience listening to everyone’s stories, even if one person’s story began in 1984….the poor girl. Younger than my school briefcase.

The rest of the day involved managerial issues that I am sure would be of no interest to you, either because you know it all already or have better things to worry about. Suffice to say, I feel more empowered than I did at 9am this morning. You can always learn something kids.

I must however remember not to have a cup of caffeine full black coffee at every break. Headache city.

Finding out what goes on on the other shifts was quite fun too. Different worlds indeed….

More tomorrow.

Categories: Age, Blog, Car, Don't laugh..., Health, Travel, Work
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