Inappropriate in the same sense that last time’s “Addictions” referred to something I forgot to write about. Last time’s addiction referred to my going cold turkey on my 4 month Travian addiction. Travian is an online game that sucks your life away, incredible when you consider it is very slow and browser-based.

So back to this week.

I Say Potato, You Say F**king Tatoes…

Last night on the way home from work, I had a sudden craving for some salt-and-vinegar-soaked chips. As you do. So desperate was I for my chips that I managed to choose a fictional short-cut to said chippery. That’s right, I have lived here 3 years and honestly thought that I had found a new road that would shave about 40 seconds off my desperate carb dash. Much foul language and a clumsy 19-point turn later I was heading back the way I came, no closer to my goal. I really think that dead-ends should be called ‘Close” and not “Way”.

Anyway, there I was waiting in the queue behind the only other customer in said chippery as he waited for his spicy potatoes. Only when he tried to remove some coins from his purse with hands shaking like a idling bus engine, did I realise he was in a pretty advanced state of alcohol-induced relaxation. After several moments, the nice chip lady cut her losses and took what he had managed to pay so far and hapless alky fellow ligged away like a Thunderbird puppet in the general direction of his official residence.

A few moments later, as nice chip lady was vinegaring my chips, the door was loudly and clumsily opened by our drunken friend who loudly and confidently, but almost incoherently, stated that “one of these f**king tatoes is baaaad….”. He obviously intended to place it on the counter but his alcoholically hampered spacial perception was no match for a flat piece of red formica and it hit the floor dangerously close to my size nine’s. The lady gave him three more potatoes and he wordlessly, and with some difficulty set off again. On my way back to the car, I spied him once more. Half way across the zebra crossing almost motionless. It was if an invisible wall had blocked his way. As he swayed gently in the wind on the (luckily) deserted road, I wondered if it was possible to sleep and sober up in that position. There I left him, his potatoes going cold.

At 10am this morning I drove past the spot and he was gone. Maybe he got home, maybe he fell asleep on the kerb nearby or maybe there is a bus somewhere with a polystyrene box and a few bits of potato stuck to it’s radiator grill. Whatever happened, someone somewhere has a headache and 74p less change in his purse than yesterday.

Webby Work

After some hours of work today, the Blog, Gallery, Forum and Links section now look more or less the same. Now, if I can only sort out the actual website, everything will be fine.

Pizza time….

Categories: Gaming, Web Design
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